A Wedding Ceremony Designed for you

  The Problem:

As in any other area of life there are a numerous skilled and highly ethical people working in the wedding industry, but unfortunately, the wedding industry is for the most part designed to make money for the vendors and is not set up to serve brides and grooms.   Wedding related advertising is directed as selling and not at saving money.   The sections below show you how to eliminate some of the major pitfalls.

  Speaking the Correct Language:

To begin with, the language you use is critically important.    I'm sure you know that some words trigger strong strong emotional reactions --   mom, dad, flag, country, etc.   Reactions  may be positive and joy filled or negative and fear evoking.   Some word also trigger dollar signs in the minds of the listener, and the word wedding is one of those words.   So when you start talking to vendors such as photographers, musicians, florists, wedding site-vendors, caterers and the like, avoid saying anything about weddings or that you are getting married.   

Here's an example that will demonstrate this point:    Call a professional photographer and say,  "I'm having some friends coming to visit me and I'd like you to come to my home and, using a digital camera, take about one hundred pictures during about four hours.   And I'd like you to turn the pictures completely over to me.   How much will this cost me?"  

A day or so later, have someone else call the same photographer and say,   I'm getting married and I'd like to know what it will cost me for you to take my wedding pictures.   Take note of the difference in price.    This difference runs across the board where weddings are concerned.    

The Bottom line:   Avoid the word wedding in your initial conversations with vendors.   Wherever possible, to purchase "non wedding" versions of the goods and services you intend to have for your wedding.

  Declaring Your Intentions:

The biggest money-saving and grief-preventing thing you can possible do is to be sure that what you are doing is the right thing to do.    By the time you read this page, you are probably well down the road to marriage, but non-the-less, its something to look at now and not after you have entered into a legal contract.

Once you have decided to hold a public event to celebrate your relationship, the next step is to decide what it is that you really want.   We invite you to examine our reference page:  Is a legal marriage what we really want?°   

When  you get married, you are, by your words, by your intentions, and by actions,  creating a context called the relationship of  __your name__  and __your partner's name__.    Your chances of a successful marriage increase when understanding the nature of the context that you are creating.   We invite you to examine our reference page:  What a context is and now does it relate to you, to your wedding, and to your marriage?°   

  A Few Things to Keep in Mind:

  Wedding Sites:

Readers are directed to the page titled:  
Parks,  Beaches,  Home Wedding Settings.°    

  Food, Beverage, Wedding Cakes, and Catering:

A Catering Alternative:    For wedding reception food, check the deli departments in one of your local grocery stores.   They will put together anything you want, and most can do so at a relatively reasonable price.   

A Second Catering Alternative:    Make your wedding celebration a family affair.    Invite your family and friend to prepare some or all of the food.

Wedding Cakes   Check the bakeries in your local grocery markets for cakes.   Don't say the word wedding when asking what they have.   Pick the kind of cake you like.    If you like, you can easily add a wedding related ornament on the cake yourself.    If you want a specific wedding cake, buy a small version and also by some extra non-wedding cakes to be sure all your guest get desert at the wedding.  See the section Wedding Cakes on the Weddings on a Wise Budget°  page.

Beverages:    If you are planning on having liquor, wine, dink mixers and/or any type of beverage that you won't use after the wedding, then purchase these items from a store that will allow you to return for a full refund, any unopened bottles.