Are you ready for marriage? Here's one pre-wedding test

Your Appointment as a Test of Character:

In dealing with thousands of people over the years, here's an observation that we find holds true across the board -- regardless of age, gender, economic level, ethnic, cultural, and religious background, etc:

To judge a persons character and to judge how he or she will relate to you in the future, simply observe how they treat animals, how they treat their natural environment, how they treat physical and material things, and specially how they treat other people.**

** "By their fruits, you shall know them."

Why is this so? Because:

What you see someone doing to other people, sooner or later, given the means, the motive, and the opportunity, they will be doing the same thing to you.

The consideration and respect (or the lack of it) that you and your partner show to us is what you can expect from your husband/wife in the future. It's only a matter of time until it shows up.

In Knitty-Gritty, Technical Terms, What Is a Commitment?

Any agreement you make with another person (or persons) is a mutual co-creation between two or more people. When you make an agreement with another person, you extend the essence of who and what you are out into the world.

Your integrity, your honor, your reputation, and your future well being are all on the line. It's a small measure of where you stand on the line between a scumbag like Al Capone on one end and saint in physical form like Mother Theresa on the other.

With regard to your wedding appointment with us, it's where both we and you put our integrity on the line. It's also one small test of how successful your up-and-coming marriage is going to be. It's a test in the sense that it represents how well you honor your commitments and it's a test because it's a measure of who you are.

What happens when You Call and Set an Appointment with Us?

In order to accommodate you, we change, adapt and/or adjust our schedule. We each set aside about two hours of our time specially for you. We commit ourselves to being at the appointment location (usually our home) when you arrive. We make sure the appointment area is neat and clean. If the appointment is near or after sunset, we turn on several lights.

Because some people arrive early, we are usually prepared for appointments thirty minutes prior to our scheduled meeting time. Appointments generally last about one hour. Because some people arrive late, we are usually reserve an additional thirty minutes after we expect the appointment to end.

In essence we each commit two hours of our time to you. Since both Connie and I are usually at our interviews, that make four hours time set aside specifically for you.

Keeping, Changing, or Breaking an Appointments

If for any reason, you need to cancel or change an appointment, ethics, courtesy, and plain old common sense indicate that you should inform us of your change of plans. Simply call us and either cancel or reschedule. When possible, we'd appreciate at least a twenty-four hour notice. Thank you.

What happens when You Don't Call to Cancel and You Fail to Show Up for Your Appointment?

You dishonor us. You waste our time and energy. You keep us away from other appointments or activities. But much more importantly, you dishonor yourself and you jeopardize your marriage before it even officially begins.

The Bottom Line:

The consideration and respect (or the lack of it) that you and your partner show to us is what you can expect from your husband/wife in the future. It's only a matter of time until it shows up. And remember, discounting your wedding officiant is only one, small, minor detail in the vast arena of your marriage relationship. If you and your partner fail at this minor test of integrity, just imagine the kind of behavior can you can both expect when major conflicts arise in your marriage?

"Let Your Spouse-to-be Beware."

If you lack the integrity and the courtesy to call and cancel an agreement you have made with us or to cancel appointment with us that you can't make or no longer want, we suggest you postpone you wedding until you've dealt with you integrity problem. If not, you're already on the path to joining the fifty percent of married couple who end up in the divorce courts.

An Invitation:

If you have any questions regarding this or any other issue that is causing problems in your life, or you are working on a project and would like a third-party, outside perspective on it, please take advantage of our free coaching offer. See the page titled: Two, Free, "Life-coaching" and/or "Personal-Success Coaching" Sessions°

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The Los Angeles Wedding Officiant

w33 --- Keeping Appointments -- Your Pre-Wedding Test

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